(And maybe thinking of Zoro kind of takes away from the point of this--sorry! But man, the guy keeps getting grimmer and grimmer as time goes by and I wish we could see HIM get some love like this too. I saw him laugh in the dub eps I watched this weekend, and it almost hurt.)
No, that's okay. I like your associations. I'd like to see something like this for Zoro, too! Hmm... might be hard to write, though... Zoro really doesn't like being vulnerable, you know? He's got boundaries. You should write that fic.
I miss the old, somewhat more easygoing Zoro too. :(
This pains me. Oh, Nami.
I feel like... Nami's not a spell-caster; in a serious scene like this she doesn't want to say anything she can't completely believe in. But I'm not sure I got it right. What she says is enough for Luffy, though.
...Much later I've realised the final lines are probably wrong with Luffy's constitution: the weaker he is, the more meat he should eat, apparently, so no mere wimpy soup! ;)
For me the main part didn't feel too urgent at first.. or not urgent--immediate, that's it...
That's interesting. I wonder if it's just because the way the fic's laid out, jumping directly into Luffy's pain-hallucinating mind, and/or because he feels helpless to act... Or if it's something I could have written otherwise if I'd sent it out for beta or something. ;)
I really felt like I wanted the ending to anchor Luffy back. Sanji seemed like the best character for it.
I am very very glad you liked it! It was the first OP fic I posted anywhere. (Still the one that ffnet readers seem to like the most alongside "Quiet Walk".)
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Date: 2009-05-13 04:20 pm (UTC)No, that's okay. I like your associations. I'd like to see something like this for Zoro, too! Hmm... might be hard to write, though... Zoro really doesn't like being vulnerable, you know? He's got boundaries. You should write that fic.
I miss the old, somewhat more easygoing Zoro too. :(
This pains me. Oh, Nami.
I feel like... Nami's not a spell-caster; in a serious scene like this she doesn't want to say anything she can't completely believe in. But I'm not sure I got it right. What she says is enough for Luffy, though.
...Much later I've realised the final lines are probably wrong with Luffy's constitution: the weaker he is, the more meat he should eat, apparently, so no mere wimpy soup! ;)
For me the main part didn't feel too urgent at first.. or not urgent--immediate, that's it...
That's interesting. I wonder if it's just because the way the fic's laid out, jumping directly into Luffy's pain-hallucinating mind, and/or because he feels helpless to act... Or if it's something I could have written otherwise if I'd sent it out for beta or something. ;)
I really felt like I wanted the ending to anchor Luffy back. Sanji seemed like the best character for it.
I am very very glad you liked it! It was the first OP fic I posted anywhere. (Still the one that ffnet readers seem to like the most alongside "Quiet Walk".)